My boss had to see her daughter off yesterday. Yesterday was the first day of my resolution to lose the 90 kgs that is packed on my frame, remember ?
A couple of my colleagues ( not the work bully, who has taken some time off for summer) decided to give the boss a treat yesterday during lunch time.
So they decided to take her out to lunch- though I am shy, I got invited too ! I needn’t spend all those hours looking at the computer at office- so I welcomed the break.
Kathy drove to a mall a couple of miles away and the grieving boss and the other colleague, four of us, took off at noon. We found a place to eat at the mall- the restaurant is placed inside a furniture shop, on the first floor. The decor was quaint and the furniture ( all for sale) doubled up as the hotel furniture too. I wonder what happens if someone actually wanted to buy some of the furniture and it was being used by a family at that time.
We seated at a table for four, overlooking a balcony, which gave us a view of the furniture shop below and all around us.
My boss is a divorcee with two grown children who she has left back in her home country, both are college students. Even though she works here, her heart and mind are with her children. After a 2 month summer break, her daughter had returned to her college and the mum and daughter were grieving. My boss reacts to grief in a peculiar way- she works harder and sits in her office for longer hours, much past office timings. She feels she has nothing to look forward to, after going home, so she prefers to be a workaholic.
But she wishes she were someplace else- she was talking to us about her dreams and aspirations. We sensed a sorrow in her thoughts and it was not entirely due to her daughter going off. Kathy diagnosed it and perhaps correctly as ” loneliness”- maybe my boss needed a special someone in her life.
Kathy announced that she was searching for a suitable friend for my boss- she said she was looking for a professional, perhaps an engineer or a lawyer, who played golf, who would do the salsa and take my boss Cyn for long drives or on travels. We added attributes to her list- I added – the physical ones, tall, dark, handsome, and someone who would take care of Cyn- perhaps someone who would cook and look after the housework too.
Cyn smiled through it all. She never said a word.
And then it was Kathy’s turn. Kathy is into swimming and snorkeling- most of her spare time being spent in water. She enjoys water sports but she has a kind heart too. She teaches disabled people swimming during all her free time. She runs a not-for-profit organization here and it has a wide outreach. Kathy talked about her room mate and co-swimming coach, who came from impoverished conditions in his home country. Her room mate was one person who ate only when he was hungry- she said. All his impulses were towards keeping alive and not for living to eat.
Interesting thoughts- set me thinking. I literally live to eat- it seems most of my day is spent on thinking about food. Thoughts about food and how it controls my life, govern my life. It seems I spend most of my waking hours, wondering how much this food was setting me back in my weight loss battle and here was this man, who just ate – because food to him, was just fuel and nothing else.
Kathy showed us pictures of their meal of the night before- a plate of fish, shiny and silvery and then another picture of the fish bones. That’s it. That was their meal.
I thought- if I could eat like that, it would be wonderful. If only I could control my obsessions with food.
Maybe, if I conditioned my mind to think like Joey, Kathy’s friend- I could too achieve the impossible and lose the first 2 kilos of my battle of the bulge.
See what a day out with colleagues taught me- to think of food as fuel and not as a full time obsession.