A young 20 something and her teenage tantrums

I have a daughter who turned 23 this year. She is away in our home country doing her best to become a doctor. She is in Medical School.

Her father and I visit her about once a year and she flies down to visit us about a couple of times a year. ( In a week from now, I will be going to visit her)

Last month, one weekend, she disappeared. We found out only about 24 hours later that our daughter had disappeared- not answering calls, picking up messages or calling back. Her father went through a Thursday pinging her repeatedly but to no response.

On Friday that week, one of his colleagues from here was going to her place to work in the same institution where my daughter is placed. He took some gifts for her from us, which we sent through him. Imagine our distress when he went looking for her in her hostel and found her “signed off” as going out. He immediately called us to inform us that our daughter was missing and that he got a ” out of town” dial tone on her phone when he called.

We were so worried, compounded by our own non-response from her over the weekend.

Hours later she picked up one of her father’s calls. On asking her where she was , she told us she was still in her town. A few minutes later and some hard questioning later, she up and fessed that she was about 10 hours from her college in a forest area where she had gone adventure sporting for a few days.

Of course, her father had a lot to say to her about her lack of responsibility and her carelessness and her dishonesty among other things. To cut a long story short, she reached her place back about 3 days later, shocked that her escapade was not hidden any more.

Now about 3 weeks later, she refuses to speak to her father. To me, she talks but only because I call her and she is my daughter.

We are going through difficult times here but the good thing is I haven’t resorted to emotional eating through it all. I am still at my diet though it was supposed to have ended last week Thursday- today is day 35- the diet was supposed to end day 32.