What we think and what actually is…

June 20, I had my birthday. Being someone who sets a great deal by birthdays, I wait for phone calls or wishes from my people, acquaintances or friends. This year, I had all of the family calling me but from two of my treasured friends no calls at all( though I was pretty sure they knew the date). And June passed by.

And July. And now half of August is past too. Yesterday I wrote to one of them about something else and we started off a chain of messages. In one message, he wrote back, I didn’t go on the Sri Lanka trip with the classmates because my father was not keeping well.

I read the message and didn’t say anything because I knew his father knew no one and couldn’t remember anything. In another time, he was an eminent Space scientist.

A couple more messages later, I read another message- my father passed away last month.

Can you believe it ? Here I was- sad, angry about my friends not wishing me on my birthday and my friends were probably battling with the illness of their father/father in law. In my ignorance or lack of understanding, I didn’t bother to ask on my birthday- I wanted them to remember on their own, which they didn’t. My callous attitude and selfishness made me miss a time of their lives when they needed someone to talk to.

We never know what the other half of the world is going through- all we think of is our wrongs. Others could be having things going wrong at the same time  too.

25 thoughts on “What we think and what actually is…

  1. Susie, you are so right. I have done this very same thing. But God forgives us & they do too. Walk in God’s blessings today, my friend.
    BTW- I missed your birthday too- did not know. At least I think I did not know- For now June seems so long ago.
    Oh & by the way, I’m following your advice- God is so good to grant me a wonderful friend like you, especially One who lives on the other side of the world.
    We may be from different parts of the world, but you are my sister in the Lord.
    God’s Love & blessings to you, Deb

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Timelesslady says:

    Susie, a belated birthday wish to you from me too. I also am glad for this reminder that when I judge someone as being unattentive, perhaps I am being exactly the same. Thanks for the wise words. Kathy


  3. I understand your your thoughts on this. I send out a lot of handmade cards. Some months 5 up to 10 and very seldom know if they even get where they are going. If I know of someones birthday or anniversary or get well need I just feel bad about not letting them know I thought of them. ( I do keep a calendar for such) Then when it is my turn ….not much. People are just too busy these days to enjoy life. Lets slow down a little and smell the roses god has placed on our path.
    Ps.if you will email me your address I’ll certainly try to get a card to you on your next BD. beverly


  4. First off…..Belated Happy Birthday Susie!!
    Second….you are so right. Many times I have only thought of myself and later found out that someone was going through something so much more difficult that what I was dealing with. This is a great reminder to open our eyes and hearts and nurture our relationships by thinking of someone else.


  5. Happy birthday, a bit late. I’m glad you found out why your birthday was ignored.

    I am the world’s worst birthday-rememberer. Despite all the good intentions, I’m likely to forget everyone’s special day. I told John once that when I am meeting new people, I should shake their hand and say, “My name is Anne. I’m so happy to meet you. I forget birthdays.”


  6. I am sorry I didn’t know about your birthday Susie – the first day of Summer, though sometimes Summer falls on the 21st – well, you’re like a breath of fresh air so of course your birthday would be on that day. 🙂


      1. I’m glad you liked it Susie. Well, when I was growing up I thought all the seasons changed on the 21st of the month, once a quarter, but then in recent years sometimes it happens on the 20th or the 22nd. I wondered why and Googled because I clearly thought it was only on the 21st … this is what I just found now:

        The March equinox would occur on the same day every year if the Earth took exactly 365 days to make a complete revolution around the Sun. … This means that each March equinox occurs about 6 hours later than the previous year’s March equinox. This is why the date of the equinox can change from year to year.

        Who says we are too old to learn new things?


  7. Belated Birthday Greetings to you Susie.
    Your post is a wonderful reminded that we should all look at a situation from a different point of view. If someone forgets a date or an arrangement, but you know they normally wouldn’t have, perhaps there’s something going on in their lives which no one knows about, and maybe just calling them and saying hello, and asking how everyone is … perhaps they might feel that they could express whatever it is which is going on. They might just need a friendly voice to get it all out of their head.

    Great post Susie.
    Hope your Birthday was truly wonderful. ~ Cobs. 🙂


    1. Dear BC,
      It was a great day and except for the rankling I felt about close friends not sending me a message, everything went well. And then there are always blog friends who are with one, no matter what. How are things in faerie land ?


      1. I didn’t want to bore everyone to pieces by continuing to focus on Faerie Land, so I do have a project which I made a couple of weeks ago, to share. But … I have to crop the photos and re-size them so that they’re the right size for the blog. Once I manage to do that, I’ll share.

        However … I’m working on some Christmas things, in the background, which do take a while to make, and those are Faerie inspired, and have plans for a diorama … but again, that’s not a particularly quick make, so won’t be appearing yet.

        But there are other things yet to be seen. 😉


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