Satisfied, responsible, loving, strong and in the present- that is my own circle of five.

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Circle of Five.”

1. A no-complaint person : I would like to spend time with someone who has been stoically strong in times of trouble, to the extent of always praising and having no complaints midst everything. I know a father who has 4 children- 3 of his children had the deadly disease cystic fibrosis- his wife, he and the daughter who was well, spent their entire lives, caring for their sick children(siblings), with no word of complaint. One day the mother died, out of sheer exhaustion and did any of them complain ? No-they managed to celebrate her going. Basically, spend time with a no-complaint person.

2. A person who takes responsibility : I would like to be with someone who can take responsibility for things that happen in his/her life. I have been with too many people who are so willing to palm off responsibilities on others, blaming others if things go wrong and making the world a miserable place.

3. A person who values the love of children, animals and of living beings not -so- high- up in order as adult human beings: Love is important here- someone who can reciprocate love in whatever form it comes to them, and from who ever.

4. A person who has strength of character : It would be great to live and work with people who have the strength and courage to stick up for what they think is right, come what may. They may or may not be able to justify why they are what they are, but they are what they are, and proud of it too and that makes a lot of difference.

5. A person who lives for the day and does not store up too much for tomorrow : I like to be with the  easy- going person, with no hang-ups and worries about what will happen tomorrow- for all we know, it may not happen and if it does, it may not be as bad as we think it will be.

The wait’s too long

There was a 14 year old dog owned by my boss. Recently my boss went on a trip and the dog was boarded along with its companion in a pet home here. When she returned the dogs were both well taken care of. A week later, last Friday, my boss took her to the Emergency Pet care- the vet examined her and told her he would give her some medicines to ease her pain- she had nodules all over ( sounds to me like lymph nodes) and she had been off food for some time and she was not at the door welcoming my boss when she returned home from work. The next day C my boss decided to take her to the vet once more. Her decision was made. She wanted to do what was right by her dog and her constant companion for 14 years. In a matter of 5 minutes, it was over. The veterinary said they would take her of her little body and bury it with dignity. My boss lives alone with her two dogs and now one is gone. I have been struggling with this loss as though it has been my own. I cannot bear to think of an animal die, especially an animal which was her friend through all the troubles she’s gone through in life.

Today in a blog post I read about Jimmy Stewart’s reading a poem in memory of his dog Beau on the Johnny  Carson show.

http://www.mnn.com/family/pets/stories/the-dog-poem-that-made-johnny-carson-cry. I have been in tears since.

It is sad that the human life span is at least 3-4 times more than a pet’s life span. In a short time in life, our pets give us so much and leave us with just memories.

It would have been worse, if we died before our pets, because who would take care of our pets should we be gone?

Same as when a mother is diagnosed to have a growth in the brain, what happens to her two daughters ? One is in college and  the other is still a school student. She was a former colleague of mine- came to know of this just yesterday. She is undergoing radiation treatment at home. So many thoughts come to my mind when I think of her. For the sake of her family and her girls’, I hope she comes back to work, fully recovered and with her cheerful heart and smile.

The waiting is long. The wait to reach our loved ones who have passed before us- our pets, our grandparents, people we knew in life and people we didn’t know, – who will be waiting for us when we reach there; the wait to know if everything will be alright once more—–.

All we can do in life is wait for our turn.

Starvation amidst plenty

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Cut Off.”

I have felt truly lonely, even when surrounded by family and everyone else, when I found no one understands me, why I think and act as I do and that I can be happy in spite of my non- conventionality.

I have a husband and children –  a 21 year old marriage, everything going well but I do feel lonely when I was considered an oddball as I gave up my job( mentioned in many previous posts) and chose to be unemployed rather than act against my principles and be forced to behave unethically. It surprises me even now that even my dearest and best can be un-understanding.

I would like to be understood- I do not mind being thought of as weird because as someone mentioned in a blog post recently, it is my weirdness that makes me distinctive.

Believe me, if one is mis-understood one can be as lonely as can be !

loneliness

Bad, good and getting better

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Worst Case Scenario.”

Most of the time the worst thing that could happen to me is what I imagine would happen to me if I met so-and-so. I have a long list of s0- and – so’s to avoid so I live under a constant panic about how and whom to avoid. It has gotten to such a state that I have forgotten why I want to avoid certain so-and-sos but I’m conditioned to avoid them.

A long time ago, my husband was on my ” to avoid” list especially after he proposed to me when I was 19 and still in college. I was so embarrassed and constantly worried about how I might be his intern when I started my housemanship( he was a fellow then). I spent sleepless nights wondering how I might avoid catastrophe for everyone knew a smooth internship depended largely on the fellow you were posted with. Omigosh!

These days it is my previous workplace fellow mates- I constantly pray I don’t have to meet them at malls, or in public places I go to. Another time I was avoiding my boss.It seems my entire life is spent avoiding people or planning tactics about how to avoid people.

Bad day

Now for the best- as you can see, I always keep the best for the end.

My best would be if I got a job in a prestigious medical school near here ( so I could get out of administration) and work in my own speciality. The job would be highly paying and my colleagues would be congenial and very professional- even more ethical and principled than I am. I would be able to write a lot of papers and would become a speaker of repute. Above all, I would be a doctor again and be able to minister to people.

make-a-wish

But I am now employed in a university which is close to the place where I really want to work- so it looks like I am getting there- things could be worse.

If only wishes were horses——- !

Garden of Eden

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “A Plot of Earth.”

It would have to be in the high ranges or mountains somewhere- my ideal plot of land. It would of course be far from the madding crowd. It would be nice if I could have it in the Dur Khaima or the Far Pavilions ( somewhere in the Hindukush mountains).

The Far Pavilions

A light snow would be falling but the weather would be pleasant. The wind would bring with it the scent of almond blossoms from the far away city of Kabul.

almond blossoms

In this plot of land, I would build up a small house, with just one room, a kitchen and a bathroom. I would have a huge fruit garden with all the fruit trees in the world- particularly apples, cherries, plums, apricots and such. I would bring trees from the tropics and would grow them there in special greenhouses that I would have there.

The soil would grow flowers and flowering plants- in the summer there would be a bed of all sorts of flowers that would form a carpet and I would have my own valley of Flowers.

When I open the windows of my house, the delicate perfume from those flowers will come flowing in. I hope not to weed, chop and cut but to let the trees and plants grow in their natural forms.

As my companions I would have a lot of animals, particularly dogs, cats, cows, goats, and any other friendly animals. They would also grow in complete freedom there.

All of us, would wander around my Garden of Eden in gay abandon and not think of the world we had left behind us, for we would be in paradise itself. Such is how my dreamland would be.

( Inspired by The Far Pavilions by M. M. Kaye- one of my all time favourite novels)

The far pavilions -1